He must become greater, I must become less. John 3:30

Wednesday, July 3

He must become greater, I must become less. John 3:30

This is my verse for this trip, we all picked a verse awhile back to focus on and this one stuck out to me the most.

First day at the orphanage

First days are always hard. I knew that I would get attached but I didn’t realize that I would get THIS attached… I mean it has been one day and I am already thinking about how hard it is going to be to leave this place and leave them.

The heat is pretty brutal and all we do is sweat, but to see the pure joy of those kids who do not have anything, makes me completely forget about it.

I have already fallen in love with a little girl Jenny. She is the happiest little thing and first thing this morning wanted to play. I put her down to play with another little boy and she screamed so I picked her back up, I played with her for most of the day and could always stop her from crying.

My heart breaks for these kids. Most have some sort of special need, and some do not even get out of the crib. But I do not want to focus on the bad, the things that hurt. I want to focus on the good, what we can see that is changing and better. This is my first time on the trip although others have been numerous times. I can see that the nannies do their best and love the kids. But they can only do so much. The babies have a lot of special needs and need therapy and do exercises and need to be out of their cribs and playing and moving around. And this is happening, maybe not as much as we would like and think is best but it’s a step in the right direction. The team members that have been before said the director is really starting to interact. Today, she came in carrying one of the babies and sat down and fed some their dinner. Apparently nothing like that had happened while they were there before.

In our devotion and worship time tonight, Shannon read one of her blog entries from her first trip, about when she goes back. We see the needs, we see the hurt, and we start making plans. But do we follow through? Do we really take it to the full force that it needs to be to be able to get done? Or do we just go back to our same old ways? You look at the kids and how most of the time they wear the same clothes day after day. And it makes me think… do I really need all of the clothes and nice things I have? It all really just seems silly and impractical when you are looking at these kids who are joyful with the little they have, and how we cannot be happy with the numerous things we own. We always want more. But what we want we usually say we “need”, and we don’t. We can lie without most of the things we have. But the kids what they want and need is the same. Food, shelter, water, and most importantly a FAMILY. While the nannies do their best in taking care of them, they will never replace a mother, and father to a child.

I don’t know if I can ever get used to all the stares and random people coming and trying to talk to us even though we cannot understand. But it doesn’t matter, as long as I keep what is important in my mind. Making those kids feel God’s love by showering them with love, compassion, making them fell wanted and special, and giving them lots of hugs and kisses.