Monday 7/20/15 - Let them see YOU in me.

Each day is a little easier. I am much more confident and less timid with the kids than two years ago on my first trip. Jesus loved the least and all I want to do is show these precious children there is hope, and love and a better life than in misery all the time from the pains of their disease. If we can distract them, even for a few hours or minutes a day, that is so much better than not going at all. Saying yes to God and his call for me to come was exactly what I needed to do. Not for me, none of this is for me or my benefit. It is for them, the children, and for the glory of God.

Something that really convicted me today, I saw on pinterest when I was up awake at 4 am this morning. "Remember to recognize the good things" it was something along those lines. And it rings so true especially for this trip, but also in my everyday life. Thinking so negatively all the time is not good, it is not healthy, remembering to recognize the good things amidst all of the bad and the hurt is something that is so important. Finding that little bit of Hope in a dark, scary situation is what will get you through and make you a stronger person in the end.

We played with the babies in the morning and we tried to get all of the babies we could in the playroom and out of their cribs/ bumbo seats. Some of them have no muscle tone and can barely hold their heads up when they should be walking. We are not physical therapists but we do the best we can to get them moving and building their strength. The babies are easier… they are mostly happier, and for the most part healthier. I love snuggling the kids against me and having them wrap their arms around me. They make me feel loved. They… these orphans who live in this place, with parents who abandoned or couldn’t take care of them, these children who have nothing, give everything with all that they have. They show me love.

My heart would be so hardened if I were in their shoes, I would be mad, and I feel I would not believe in love or give it out so freely to strangers. But they do.. time and time again.

In the afternoon after lunch, bible study/worship/ break time we went back to spend time with the older kids. This was the first day that was super hot, we have been blessed with great weather all week. About 90, but at least its not 100 degrees. We split into two groups, I was outside with the kids who can walk, first. We played with bubbles, beach balls, and chalk! They had a blast! And they ate suckers which they loved. Goofing off and playing with them in an open environment with fresh air was just what they needed. The kids were so much better behaved. Then I went inside where the kids had been doing crafts, stickers, coloring etc. and loved on the kids in there.

The smells can be overwhelming at times, and the kids are slobbery and snotty, and have rashes. But loving them is what I was called to do. I want them to feel so loved while we are here, just in case this is the only time that they feel it. They deserve so much more than what life has offered them thus far, and our job is to make it a little more bearable. To show them and the nannies love so that they may see God. Many question us why we are there, why we come and do this, and Jenny's response has been, because we have Jesus in our hearts, because he loves us, so we love them. Among many other words that are way better than my little synopsis.

For dinner we went to a barbeque place. And no it is not quite the same as barbequing at home. Steve took one person from each table up and told us what each thing was. There were raw meats, and vegetables, fruit, rice and noodles and various other things. Then we were to take our table through the line and tell everyone what each thing was. If you don’t know me well, I do not really eat meat in the U.S. so eating meat here in China is a rarity for me. But I did it, we cooked our meat and veggies on a pan in front of us and I even tried lamb. And again this was a great experience and fellowship with everyone in the group. If I havent said already.. I love our team. Everyone is so willing to jump right in and do what is necessary for the kids and I love it!