God will provide... Im taking the leap and the journey continues.

Please take a moment to watch this beautiful representation of our work in Chenzhou, and the beautiful faces we have come to love.


God Will Provide....

I felt God speaking to me over the past few months, telling me that I needed to go back to China this summer.

But I honestly doubted at first. I knew I didn't have the money, and I knew how busy I was with school and dance team and did not know if I could raise the money. So I disregarded what He was telling me. But ever persistent He is and how thankful I am for a God that loves us enough to give us chance after chance to hear Him and be obedient in what His plans are for our lives.

I knew from a young age that China would be a part of God's plan for me and my life. I still do not know exactly what it is, but I believe that this mission trip to the Chenzhou orphanage is a part of that plan.

Being a college student and trying to raise funds for this trip on such short notice is extremely difficult. Throughout the year I am busy with dance and school and I have not had a job during the year. I am trying to come up with ways to fundraise the money in a very short time. Airline tickets are what is next on the agenda to pay for and that is a large sum of money at one time. Please pray with me as I continue to lean on God because I know if this is His plan, He will provide.

I am so happy to be going on this trip again. I have been struggling with knowing my purpose lately and I've been feeling very unmotivated. But ever since I responded to God's call  to go on the trip I have been much more motivated in every aspect of my life. I cannot wait to be back in China and with these precious people that have captured my heart.

Boys

The trip this year is exciting because we have a team of 16!! And in that 16 there are 5 males... We have never had men go on the trip before, other than Steve our guide in China. This is such a blessing because the kids and the nannies will be shown that they are loved by all, it is natural for girls to love kids, but these kids will really benefit from getting to run and play and interact with these men.

Translator

We have been blessed with another translator as well! No one at the orphanage speaks English and God must have heard our prayers because she is also a believer. This means we will have a greater chance of sharing the gospel with them. Along with our actions of love and trying to be Jesus to them.

The teams that have gone for many years now have planted the seed, and we have built a beautiful relationship with them, we hope to see this grow as well. Many great things are coming together for this year and I am so excited to see what God will do.

Li Ming Orphanage
 We will be going to two orphanages on this trip. The first for a longer period of time is Chenzhou. But the second is one this team has not been to before. This is exciting because we are planting seeds somewhere else in China! Pray that the Love of the Lord is shown through us and our work there and that they will be open and accepting to us.

This is a portion of a letter my team leader sent before my first trip in 2013. This is a glimpse of why we go, and what we do.

 

Some will ask you, what is your trip about, why are you going? Because they ask me the same question. And it is hard to put into one simple answer. Is it about visiting orphans? Well of course it is. I believe with all my heart in James 1:27. But it goes SO far beyond visiting the orphans. It is kind of like this large puzzle and we have ALL these pieces that need to fit together to make it complete. You & I are some of the pieces. The nannies, the school, the director, the building itself, and of course, the orphans are ALL pieces of this puzzle. We know that God himself has designed THIS puzzle and He is placing each piece the way it needs to fit together. We want to be Jesus to everyone we meet. Some days that means we rock babies who are really sick. A piece of the puzzle into place. Some days that means we run around after big kids and give tons of hugs. A piece of the puzzle into place. Some days it means we sit and hold the hand of a nanny and smile and hug her. A piece of the puzzle into place. Some days it means we show up at a school where the orphans attend and we love on them in front of the other kids who have parents, and pray that they feel special. Some days it means we use our voice to gather the funds to send those kids to school, or fight for those who need families or we figure out WHAT can we do to change things, even if just a little. Some days it means we go to the local church and show our support. Some days we sit with our guide and show him verses in our bible that are special to us and explain why. Some days we just cry, and even that is ok. THAT might be the glue that sticks those puzzle pieces together.

 

Here is a little update on Emerson...
Little Emerson got the cleft palate and cleft lip surgery that I and others advocated for. She has also been ADOPTED!! How exciting is that. My baby girl is in the United States somewhere, but we unfortunately have no information of who her family is, and no way to find that out. I have tons of pictures and stories that I know her family would love to have, I hope that one day I will find contact to give them these things I know they long for.

Before surgery

After surgery

Sorry it has taken so long to post since I have been home I have been going non stop, and have written this in pieces so I am sorry that it is scattered and I am sure full of grammatical errors.

Well our last day in China was a full day of going to the Great Wall of China climbing some huge stairs to get to the wall and then the half of the group that made it up first went on and climbed until we couldn’t climb anymore and I do not think I have ever sweated so much in my life then I did that day. It was crazy we all just looked like we had gotten out of the shower, but I assure you we did not smell like we had. It was crazy all of the uneven steps and the steep slopes to climb. It amazes me that people built this, I just do not get how! The whole point to going to this part of the Great Wall was so we could do the slide down! We saw that there was a long line and our guide said he thought we would just take the cable car (ski lift) down, because we were already off our schedule timing wise. I was the only one down there with him at that point and I told him that everyone would be really mad if we didn’t get to go down the slide because that was why we had toured that part, and why we had driven 3 hours to get to it. So he let in and we got our tickets. We sat on these little sleds and pushed the lever forwards to go and pulled backwards for the brake. This was our way down from the wall and let me tell you it was WAYYYYY more fun than climbing up those treacherous stairs to get to the wall.

One of the last days we were there, a little girl we called Ella, was in the elevator with some of us with a lady and a man. We didn’t think much of it, but later we found out that she was being adopted by them! She would stay in Chenzhou with the couple that adopted her! Ella was Steve’s (our guide) favorite baby! He said he liked her big round eyes.

I was ready to leave only because we were not with the kids anymore, and that was my purpose those kids, nannies, and that orphanage. So without that I kind of felt lost. So I was ready to come back. But after just a week I was ready to go back to china, I missed it, even though I was hot and sweaty all of the time, it was worth it to make the people in that orphanage be able to have a little more. A little more clothes, toys, but most of all, LOVE and not only our love but God’s love and affection. Some people may think that since we did not build anything or that we didn’t do a VBS for the kids, that we didn’t do anything that will help them. But I believe we gave them all that they desire, love, attention, and FUN.

So many people have asked how was your trip, was it everything you expected? Etc. I didn’t go into this trip having expectations, I went into it curious, and anxious to experience it. People ask “did you bring one back in your suitcase? I bet you wanted to”. I just don’t think people get it. These children are not some souvenir. They are real, human beings, and people do not take me seriously when I say, I want to adopt Emerson. If it weren’t for the laws that I have to be at least 30 and married for at least 5 years than I would have, even though I am only 19 years old. Even though I am still in college.

Things since China have been… busy. I have constantly had things to do; work, babysit, find everything for my apartment. But there has not been a day that I have gone without thinking about Chenzhou. Replaying memories from our time there, wondering what they are doing, worrying that they will be okay.

Updates: The heart babies Charlotte and Sarah are going to Beijing to get their surgery!!!! Also, with the help of Joan Mitchell, we have been able to get Smile Train to contact the director in Chenzhou and my baby girl Emerson is going to get her cleft lip and cleft palate surgery! Also Amy’s tiny baby Angelina is getting her surgery for her cleft lip and palate. I could not be any more excited for how God is working in that place. There are so many things that he is doing, and I am honestly a bit overwhelmed with excitement, and gratitude. I am so happy the heart babies Sarah and Charlotte will get the surgery needed in order to survive, and I am so happy that Emerson and Angelina will get the surgery for their cleft palates and cleft lips, while they are still healthy enough to do so, I am hoping that eating becomes an easier task for both of them so they can grow strong.

The life I always pictured may not be a reality for me anymore. I want more I want to do more, and I don’t know if what I pictured myself doing is right for me. This trip has opened my eyes up to a whole new world, and God may have different plans for my life then what I thought.

Going on this trip put a lot of things into perspective, like…. I have way too much stuff. I am very blessed and maybe a little bit spoiled. I have a lot of support from family and friends and could not be more grateful for that. There are so many more things, but I honestly do not think that you will understand where I am coming from unless you GO and see for yourself. People have so much to give, whether you think you do or not, there is always something you can do. Find a cause and support it, whether it is adoption, sending money to support a family or child, or going and serving. God calls us to do these things, he expects us to serve the broken, the weak, the widowed, orphaned and the hungry. But we all too often let life and business get in the way of what really matters.

I know my girls are supposed to be getting their cleft surgeries but I have not heard anything for a few weeks but when I do I will post about it. I could not be more excited for them and happy the orphanage is so willing to help them.

Moving into my first apartment, thoughts of worrying about money, trying to get a job, worrying about school and dance team are consuming my time. But not a day goes by that I do not think about Chenzhou and the work we did there and the things I saw and the people I loved, still love through the distance. I know God is working on his plans for my life and I will try to patiently wait to understand just what they are, but I have an idea that His glorious plan has to do with those kids, those people, because China will forever have my heart.

Goodbyes

July 12th

Of course I would break my camera and get sick the last day we were here…

just my luck. But as I sit here on this 8 hour train ride from Chenzhou to

Beijing I cannot help but feel like I am missing something, or better yet,

someone. Forever a piece of my heart will be in Chenzhou. The way those

nannies showed that they love us just as much as we love them, the way they

followed along, and even sang along with the Chinese version of our song

"You Are Holy". All of these things showed that they care; they are accepting

of us. One of the nannies that we call Liz gave us each a necklace, which

was so sweet. We all got a gift from the director who even cried when she

left us at the train station, when we all exchanged hugs and goodbyes.

We had a celebration today. They had all kinds of fruit and peanuts set

out for us, and we took a group picture of all the nannies, the kids, and

us. Then we did performances. The older kids did a few, then just the

school kids, then just Dennis and Taylor. They did a “Street dance” with

hats and sunglasses that was hilarious! Then the older kids did motions to a

song that the nannies and the director sang. It was really heartfelt and

moving. We sang our song and I am sure that it was not good, but we sang

from the heart and to our Lord. It was really encouraging to see the

nannies and director singing along and following with our song we gave to

them in Chinese. They bought a huge three layer cake for us all and one of

the school boys came and sat with me and was eating all of my fruit. I had only partially eaten because we were scared of getting sick. And then they passed out the cake to all of us girls first

and I ate a little bit. It was really good and the boy really wanted it so I

gave him the rest and then they came around and gave all of the kids their

own piece so they were going crazy and making such a mess with the cake and

all of the fruit. I mean it was EVERYWHERE. But at least we know that  they

really enjoyed it!

When we sat in the train station waiting for our train just after saying

goodbye to the nannies and the director who tagged along on our bus to see

us off, we got many stares and I was asked to take a few pictures with

people, along with some of the others in the group. We ate lunch at the

orphanage today after saying goodbye to the kids, but none of us were

really in the mood to eat. After a quick lunch, some of the nannies and

the director walked back to the orphanage with us so we could get our stuff

and then ride a bus to the train station where we said goodbye. We showed

the nannies and the director one of the videos one of the girls made of

pictures from the trip and they seemed to really enjoy it. They asked for us

to send it to them and one nanny asked for Annie to put it on her memory

card for her. The train ride was interesting. 8 hours is a long time but it

was better than having to deal with the airport. We met up with our new

guide that will be with us the next two days and he took us to the hotel.

Tomorrow is when we visit the Great Wall, and go shopping! So It will be a

fun day. Knowing that I am not waking up to go to the orphanage tomorrow is

really hard to accept.

The view out my window on this train seeing the mountains and hills and

small villages, big cities, but it just reminds me that I am just getting

further and further away from my sweet babies.

I hate goodbyes. I am no good at them. I usually tend to make things

awkward, and saying goodbye today was terrible. Saying goodbye to the

nannies was hard. But saying goodbye to kids was horrible. I was trying to

do it as quick as possible while still savoring those last few moments. It

didn’t feel real. It didn’t feel like we were really leaving. When I went to

the baby room, Emerson was luckily not on an IV at the time. She had just

gotten off of it and she was about to get her bottle so I fed her and got

to hold her and snuggle and kiss her for a while before we had to leave. By

that time after telling her I loved her in Chinese and English a hundred

times I kissed her a few more times after placing her in her crib and could

not stop the tears. Her nanny hugged me and kissed me on the cheek, and she

was crying also with those of us in that room. They had her in the adorable

outfit I put her in days ago and that made me happy. I just can’t help but

wonder what will happen to them once we are gone. I mean I know those

nannies love them and do their very best to take good care of them, but

there are only so many nannies, and only so much that they can do. With more

hands it is easier to take care of so many children. I am scared that the

babies will not be held or picked up and will be confined to their cribs to

entertain themselves. It breaks my heart because if I had to sit in an

orphanage day after day I would go absolutely insane. Think about how many

of those kids might be more mentally there if they were not wasting away in

an orphanage. Think about if they had a loving family how much they could

be changed.

It hurts me that most of the kids there will not leave. What is

to become of the least of these? What are we doing to help? Think about

what you could give up so that they could have a little more. I know I sure

have been thinking about what more I can do for not just them, but orphans in

general. God specifically says to take care of the orphans. Why are we not

obeying? Since when can we pick and choose which directions he gives to follow?

If Only...

July 11, 2013

If I was just a little older…. She would be mine. I would have turned the paperwork in the day I first saw Emerson. It does not even matter to me that I am not married nor will I be anytime soon. I would still take her in a heartbeat. It may sound crazy but in a way it felt like she was mine.  I was trying to think of ways I could make it work, get my parents to file for adoption and I just claim her as mine until I am legally able to adopt her. But obviously I know none of that would work.. if only.

It is weird how certain kids are drawn to you or you are drawn to them, a bond you would not have gotten to experience if not for going on this trip. I just cannot get over the pure joy these kids have, they are  ecstatic to play with a wet wipe…. How many of you could say that your child would be entertained for a good while with one? I am sure not many, these kids do not have much but they have a a lot more of the important stuff than some of the rest of us. They have love, they have constant joy, they are happy though they could rightfully be mad, upset, and closed off to the world. But these kids look past that, they look past what their past was and they see in the here and now. I think that is what a lot of us are missing, trying to see the good in the world. We need to look for the positive, seek it out. We need to have faith like a child, and love like we have never been hurt. Because let me tell you, these kids have seen more hurt in their lifetime than most of us do and that’s horrific.

The orphanage had us over for dinner again, and we are having lunch there tomorrow. Which is special because in previous years this has not happened. The cook prepared a huge meal and it was delicious! We prayed before we ate and Steve our guide translated it for the nannies and the director. Then she gave a speech thanking us for all that we do, and for having a team return each year, etc. She is a very diplomatic lady and even she got teary eyed, which was really sweet. It is obvious that she, along with all of the nannies, loves those kids and wants what is best for them. I am so thankful that they are open to many options, especially about sending the two heart babies to New Hope Foundation where they can get surgery and the proper care they need. After dinner we all took pictures with the nannies and took a group photo us, and the nannies as a team because that is what we are. We are all there for one reason, those kids and trying to make their lives a little better.

We went to a bead store on the way back from the orphanage this morning and a few of us chose some bracelets. But the lady who worked there had no idea what we were saying and we had no idea what she was saying, but luckily a 13 year old girl walked by and said hello to us so she asked her to come in and translate for us. And of course we got another picture with all of them.

We went outside with the big kids for an hour this morning and made paper chains and we did those little animals or shapes that you drop into hot water and they form into their shape out of the capsule. They loved this and then later when we were with them again in the afternoon we let them draw on their own slap bracelets and we “decorated” cookies. Well, we put  a blob of icing on the cookie with a little wooden spoon for them to spread it out with. And then they ate them, A LOT of them and were on a major sugar high! So things got a little crazy in that room.

Just seeing the differences in the kids from the first day is amazing. They were all great, but are just so much more even now, and they just blow my mind. How smart, and loving they are in these conditions.

I thought that I would really struggle with my patience on this trip and that I would get stressed out and frustrated, which I did a few times, but it was nothing compared to what I thought it might be. You look at those kids and you just cannot be mad, or upset. They are just too darn cute and too sweet. Yes, they may be rough sometimes, but they do not have structure and almost all of them have some special need that makes it that much harder. But my patience came easy with them.

We leave tomorrow and I am dreading it… saying goodbye to those kids and nannies is going to be one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Knowing that most of those kids will never leave that orphanage saddens me. But I also have to realize I can’t fix everybody, I cannot fix everything… This trip has taught me a lot, that I need to rely on God more and not try and do everything myself, and many other lessons. I am so glad for my time here in Chenzhou and I will miss all of them so much! They will forever be in my heart.

Pure Joy

July 10th

We only got to be at the orphanage for half the day today and it was in

the morning when Emerson is on an IV so I did not get to hold her but for

just a few minutes before she got put on it. The other half of the day was

spent resting and relaxing, and some of us went shopping for the kids. We

got the school kids a few outfits and we also got underwear and we are

getting every child a new pair of shoes. We then had dinner at KFC again

where I ate mashed potatoes and French fries with a peach tea. I was glad

to not have to eat the meat. My meal was very good, and even better

when we all got ice cream afterwards!

Joy. These kids know pure joy. Nothing melts my heart more than having

sweet Cameron, a little boy with downs, run the whole length of the hallway

and run and jump into my arms with a huge smile on his face which he is

never without. He gives the best hugs; he squeezes like he is never going

to let go.

We celebrated one of the baby’s 2nd birthday so it was an excuse to get a

cake and get the babies all messy. They were so cute and absolutely loved

the cake, even though most of it ended up on their faces and even some on

hands and feet.

After playing with the babies for a little bit we went outside with the

big kids so they could run around and get some energy out. We put tattoos

on them and they wanted them EVERYWHERE, their hands, legs, arms, face. It

was hilarious, and they loved it! The nannies also gave them suckers so

that kept most of them pretty quiet for a little while. We noticed a lot of

cavities in their teeth, and I know that none of them ever get them

brushed, so they are just going to get worse and worse. I know most people

don’t like going to the dentist, but be thankful that you have the

capability of getting dental care. We are so fortunate and I think that we

forget how lucky we are a lot of the time.

 

We always have water bottles with us, because it is so hot and we sweat so

much, but none of us ever drink it all so we usually end up giving a lot to

kids. I never see them drink water, and they have got to be so dehydrated,

so if they see us take a drink they want it. They will beg for some water,

so naturally we just give them the rest, pouring a little into each kids

mouth.

In devotion tonight Amy brought up that when we are broken and empty that

that is when we need to let go and let God. When we have nothing else to

give, that is when we need to let him do his powerful work, because he can

and will if we put all of our trust in Him. He wants us to rely fully on

Him and not try and fix everything ourselves because whether we like it or

not we do not always know what is best for our lives.

Knowing that we only have a day and a half left with the kids makes me so

sad, but I intend to make the best out of it and cherish every moment that

happens. Sometimes I think I am ready to be home, but I do not want to

leave these kids. I wish I could take every single one of them home with

me. My life would be complete if I could!

My Heart Was Breaking Today...

Good news! Two of the babies with heart conditions, Sarah and Charlotte (who is blue), got to go to the hospital today to get tests done to see if they can be helped by New Hope Foundation. This was such a blessing and answer to prayer because we have all been really worried about them.

My heart was breaking today as I walked into the baby room where Emerson is and she is on an IV and being checked by doctors. They put them on IVs for EVERYTHING, even just a cold. I have no idea why the doctors were there, but I hate to see the kids tied up in the chairs when they get those IVs. They just sit there and cry and you cannot pick them up to comfort them so it is just really sad.

Today we played with the babies for an hour when we first got there, and then we played with the big kids outside for two hours. Then we left, and we came back at 3 and played with the babies for an hour and a half then played with the big kids for an hour. I finally got to hold Emerson, but her congestion is getting worse so I am a little worried about her. Her breathing is more labored and she sounds wheezy and is coughing. I cannot believe that in 2 and half days we have to say goodbye to these kids…. I am getting teary eyed just thinking about it.

Back to Emerson again…. Amy (another team member) and I were talking today, and realized that I don’t even notice Emerson's cleft palate and cleft lip anymore. It is like it is not even there. All I see is a beautiful, happy, sweet, sweet, sweet baby girl. Obviously it is still there, but it is so fixable and she is already a gorgeous baby. Seeing these kids and what they go through, loving the least of these makes me realize that we are so superficial, judgmental and honestly stupid for a lot of the ways we think, view things and do things. Because in reality the things we treasure most, the things we find important are not at all. They are almost always a waste of time. Love is looking at the outside but SEEING what is on the inside.

  



It is just really sad to me that so many kids are adoptable, they would fit great into a family, but all the laws and rules about waiting a certain amount of time and how they are eligible frustrates me. There is a boy we call Taylor. He was abandoned by his parents, came to the orphanage then his grandfather came and picked him up, but then was unable to take care of him so he had to go back. Now he waits until they can start his paperwork. He deserves to be in a family now; he is so smart, extremely helpful to the nannies with all of the younger kids, and really sweet. But then there are also the kids who never will be adopted, the ones who will age out sitting in the orphanage. What I don’t get is how you choose who is acceptable to be on the list to be adopted or not. These kids are no different. Well yes, they may look a little different, or act in a certain way but they are loving, and special just the same. I think everyone should have an equal chance at family. But then again I also understand that it costs money to add a child to the list and they try and choose who they think will be adopted the quickest, and also that there is a limit to how many can be on the list.

There is this little boy named PJ that sits on a little pot all day long and just shakes his head side to side with his eyes wide open. It is honestly a disturbing sight. But for the past couple of days he has gotten more used to us we have given him more attention and he will let us hold him, and he goes outside now. He doesn’t talk, well most of the kids don’t do more than laugh and grunt. But laughter means the same thing in every language so of course we can understand that. Today I got him up off the pot and pulled him onto my lap, (he also wears split pants) which is something that does not even phase me now, a lot of the kids do and so do kids on the street, sometimes without pants at all. That is one thing that is totally different from how we do it in America. But back to PJ; he let me hold him and rub his back and hug and kiss him which is big because he is so stiff does not really like being touched and just seems to be scared. I was glad that he was willing to let me hold him today.

I finally got Ben to laugh. He is such a loner and loves to play by himself because he can have all of the toys that way. But I tried to get him used to me a little bit and I was playing with him and I started throwing him up in the air and he absolutely loved it. He was giggling and it was the cutest thing. They say he has a blood disorder but you would never know it.

We gave the nannies their books today that have letters and pictures from various people, some kids who were adopted from there, their parents etc. And they really seemed to enjoy them. Steve, our guide, translated all of the letters to Chinese and had both in there for them.

China is so loud. All the time there are hundreds of different smells, horns honking, people singing, bells ringing, music playing and other noises. It is something I am not sure I could ever completely get used to. I like to be able to not see the street lights and hear every single sound of the city outside my window.

I really appreciate everyone’s prayers. They have helped me tremendously. This trip is wonderful, a beautiful experience, but also extremely exhausting, both physically and mentally. I believe with all my heart God has called me to work with Chinese orphans in some way. I have not figured out exactly what that is but I think that’s okay. Whatever it is, He has definitely been preparing me for it with this trip.

I think one of the hardest things to remember is that this is NOT about us. It is not about what I can get out of this trip. It is about what I can GIVE throughout this trip, how I can show/give love, which then shows Christ.

Church with the kids

Sunday July 7, 2013

Church was…. An experience. I am so thankful we got to pick some of the big kids up from the orphanage and take them there even though they have absolutely no attention span. Two of the nannies tagged along and they each took a child. And we had 11 kids with us. First of all it is only 8:45 in the morning and already deathly hot so we tried to look a little nicer today, like in longer skirts and such but we were so sweaty! When we got to church they sent us to the balcony and we all sat the kids in between us. They were actually really good and even though we couldn’t understand any of the service, I am glad that we were able to go and bring them. The more that people see, the more that they might want to help. It was miserably hot as there was no air conditioning and there were quite a few people there. We were all soaked with sweat. We went in very prepared. We had Hello Kitty coloring books, and crayons, suckers, and fruit snacks. Most of the kids begged us for our water so we gave some of them that too. I was in charge of a 3 year old, a little one we call “Dora” and she did really well, surprisingly. We did not get to play with the babies today, but I of course had to go love on my baby Emerson and sweet Jenny for a little bit before we left for church.  We called it a day after lunch and went back to the hotel; some of us chose to do a little exploring and shopping.

We ate lunch at the orphanage and we had all sorts of good food! It was probably one of the best meals since we have been here, and for dinner we went to Pizza Hut. Steve, our guide, and the waitress could not get it through their heads that we ONLY wanted pizza. They were so confused. This Pizza Hut was a sit down nice restaurant and they had combo meals like pizza, pasta, salad, chicken wings, and cake, and some fancy drink. But all we wanted was cheese and pepperoni pizza with Pepsi and no ice! So finally after an hour of waiting to be seated (while we explored Walmart) and then a good 20 minutes trying to order we finally got our pizza!! It was delicious and all of us were stuffed! Steve said it was so much cheese and not enough variety that he had to walk back. We had taken the public bus, so he walked and we rode the bus. We saw a bus pass by that was so packed full that I almost started having an anxiety attack. I would not have been able to get in a bus like that without having full blown anxiety, and my anxiety is already up so high worrying about the plane crash that just happened! Thankfully, our bus did not have that many people. It was crowded but I could handle it.

Our devotion today was called a date with God. Each of our hotel rooms had two stations in them with an “activity” small devotion, to do. At one, we wrote notes of love/encouragement to each team member, we wrote what we were thankful for especially for those who helped us to get on this trip. We highlighted verses in our guide's bible we are giving him. We wrote words on a mirror to describe how God sees us and how He is changing us and working in our hearts to make us better women. We looked at the fruits of the spirit, and which ones we needed to focus on the most, mine being patience. We asked God to show us who from Chenzhou to be praying specifically for this week. Along with many other things to get our minds focused and right on the Lord.

Most of yall who know me know that I do not like crowds/loudness, being really hot, and confined spaces. All of which you cannot get around in China. So people may say, well this is not the place for you, or why did you come then? I came to love on these kids, nothing else is as important right now. And  things like this will be uncomfortable, you are in a foreign city, with foreign people, and foreign food. But sometimes uncomfortable is good. We need to be pushed a little bit to grow. And I would not let my fears/ anxieties stop me from doing what God has called me to do.

I am constantly reminded of the verse I chose as my verse for the trip. John 3:30 “He must become greater, and I must become less”. How true is that? For God to become the center of our lives we have to take us out of it and out him and others before ourselves. We must know that not everything is about us, and that in order for us to bow down to Him as the King that He is we have to make less of ourselves and give Him more of us to use for His will. We are merely servants doing our masters work, and in order to serve others with the right mind, and attitude you must become humble.

The older kids making crafts: 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lunch at the Orphanage